Fear (Written July 1, 2013)

I’m feeling a feeling I’ve not felt before.
It’s there, like despair, but something more.
Like icy cold fingers or a burning sear,
For the first time in my life I feel encompassed by fear.


Ah, that worked very well. I just love when I get hit by random inspiration. It has happened more than once that I wake up in the wee hours of the morning to find a piece of paper and write down something that I thought of in a dream. I love those! But anyway, on to what I was saying in the poem! The poem which is more than a little over exaggerating. Just this past year I discovered that I have GERD- gastroesophageal reflux disease. Basically what it means is that I get chronic heartburn. That is bad, of course. Stomach acid washing up your esophagus just isn’t good for you. You can get ulcers and even cancer. Not that it is all the difficult to take care of. If you don’t eat acidic foods and drink certain drinks, and make sure you take your acid reducers, it shouldn’t cause problems. Right now, however, I am a bit freaked out, because that isn’t taking care of it like it should. The medicine isn’t making the heartburn go away, and what food I eat I can’t seem to keep down. None of this is very pleasant, but it is not of major concern either. I just have never had health problems- I used to be known for having an iron stomach and never ever getting sick- like this, and it is a bit disconcerting. (If you look at my other poems you’ll realize I complain horribly every time I get sick. I’m pathetic, really!) Ahh, most especially because I always feel like there is this bad pressure in my chest. >.<

That aside! If I don’t end up writing between now and the 4th (I will be babysitting, and very busy, though I hope to write a poem for the occasion), Happy Independence Day to all the Americans who might read this! My condolences to anybody else who lives in Colorado, I think there are only two or three shows that didn’t cancel, and personal fireworks are just downright dangerous right now. Bummer right?


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